No one ever suspected me of being gay. I've always had lots of friends, and have had girl friends, but only because it was expected of me. I was living a happy yet closeted life, but I didn't mind. I was well liked, did well in school, athletic, the girls thought I was quite the charmer. I wanted my life to stay this way, so I never revealed to anyone that I was gay. I was not ashamed of this, I was just afraid of what would happen. I wanted to keep the balance of my fragile life. But it did not stop me from being myself and acting the way I wanted. I just had to repress my sexual desires.

At school I could be hitting on a girl and stutter, not because of her, but because of the attractive guy who just walked by. I took advantage of every chance I got to see my friends and peers naked. I would spend hours on the internet looking for hot gay porn, especially with huge muscle men who dominate weaker men. This drove me nuts. I would fantasize and dream about some of my hot friends packing on muscle and becoming complete studs. I would also patiently wait and watch their behavior for the slightest hint that they also may be gay, finally releasing me from my virginity theough hot man on man sex between the two of us. I would play it all out in my mind how it would happen and what I would do, how I would suck his cock, what I would scream as he fucked me real hard, what I would do with my tongue when we passionately kissed. No matter how much I jacked off, I still needed release. And I waited for the day it would happen.

Luckily I didn't have to wait too long… •