Then one day from nowhere came this guy into the gym and introduced us with the 'roids'. My world was consumed by the thoughts of getting huge and everyone just looking at me with an awe. You can imagine the delusions of grandeur a 15 years old gets. My arms measured a flimsy 11 1/4'' a bodyweight of 116. I was ready for the massive arms thick back and barrel looking chest. I started with a small cycle of 2mgs. Maxibolin a day and almost instantaneously I felt I was getting huge. All in my head no doubt. Then greed set in and Dianabols 5 mgs. daily.

Eventually I took the plunge and did the unmentionable, I started taking injectables. All this took place in the course of a couple of months. Man I wanted to look like Casey Viator, Sergio Oliva, Tim Belknap. I would eat everything in sight and doubles of it for good measure. The weight was coming up. I would change gyms ever so often and each one being more hard-core than the last. Until I decided I was ready for my first show. I had no idea what a precontest diet consisted of. Tuna for me meant tuna fish sandwiches. Rice was a meal of my moms rice and black beans without the fried plantains.

When I asked the night before the show what I should carb up with they said figs so I went to the local 7 11 and bought a box of fig Newtons. I was so psyched for that show. It was the Mr. Miami Beach. It was supposed to of been held outside by the water but because of the weather they moved it inside to a small dining area. Boy now that I think about those days bodybuilding sure has come a long way. And believe me I'm not that old. I received 6th place out of 6 guys. I was devastated. But I swore I'd come back with a vengeance. I felt I had learned a little bit of my body and was ready to do some serious training. I was 15 at the time.

Boy did I have to learn a lot yet. But the cycles kept increasing and the size was coming on. Back in those days the bigger and more bloated you looked the more everyone complimented you. I think by the time I was 17 I had reached 208. Then I started to train with what was the most intense training partner I had. This guy pushed me like few times I've been pushed till now. I was squatting 500lbs, benching 300lbs. and deadlifting 500. Our workouts were grueling. Guys would stand around and watch us train. he was competing at a regional and national level. I was trying to take a crack at the local shows. But I was hungry, lifting was my life.

I quit school took on the life of a bodybuilding bum that lived at home. Trained in the morning, went to the beach during the mid day, took my nap before heading to the gym for my 2nd session of torture. I was looking pretty good, lean and tight. I was getting ready for the 84 Mr. Miami. The diets back then were horrendous. if you didn't suffer 24/7 you just weren't dieting hard enough. It was something that just had to happen. Well sadly enough to say I did the unmentionable, I broke my diet and decided I couldn't live the humiliation to go back to the gym and face my gym peers. I remember I broke it on a Saturday I went to the Miami International Airport on Sunday purchased a one way ticket to Cali, to live with my sister.

I split early Monday morning. I left my training partner waiting at the gym for me. I just couldn't face him. I remember as soon as I got to my sisters apt. I called him at the gym. He was very indifferent with me. I was hurt and felt I had let someone that had been there for me down. But I was in the Mecca of bodybuilding and swore I'd make the most of it. I was in heaven. Everywhere I went around Venice or Santa Monica I would recognize one of the pro's from the magazines. I felt like a kid in a candy store. The first day I joined a gym this guy comes up to me and just gives me this price list of steroids I was floored. I think I must have kept that sheet for years. Drugs out there were plenty and I took advantage of them.

Well, since then I've never really stopped training, though my diet has been good and bad for periods of time. I've continued taking steroids, taking my bodyweight to 272. My squat has gone up to 800, bench 600, seated military press 405 and hack squat to 900 for reps of 12. I am presently back on track with my training and diet. I'm getting ready for a state show. I'm really happy with the way I look. I can see that muscle maturity that I wished for in my younger days. I'm taking deca durabolin, primobolan, proviron, testoviron, anadrol and growth. it tends to get a little expensive at times. Now that I look back I know I have sacrificed a lot in my life for the path I've chosen. But too much has been invested to just give up. I am a lot more balanced with my bodybuilding. I know I will never be a pro nor do aspire to become one. But it has been quite a ride and have many stories and memories. I don't regret ever taking roids because the look I have achieved has been a great contributor to many of the things and places I've seen and done." •