Mail-Order Muscles

By Frklvr


Hank sat in the bar pissed that his girlfriend had dumped him. He had been throwing back shots and downing beer in a determined bid to get wasted. The bartender had made one attempt at talking with Hank but was cussed out for his effort. After out finding out that Hank had driven there nor was planning to drive anywhere, the bartender decided to leave Hank alone. As Hank finished his latest round of shots and beer, a man in a long, black trenchcoat took the barstool next to Hank. The man ordered a beer and casually looked Hank over as he waited. The bartender gave the man his beer and shook his head as a warning about Hank. The man laid out some money for another round of shots and beer for Hank. Hank looked over at the man. The man just raised his glass to Hank. When the bartender brought the beer and two shots, Hank grabbed one shot and downed it immediately, then began drinking the beer as if it were water. "You're really put them away," the man finally said, "What's the occasion?" Hank looked at the man for a few seconds, then said, "My fucking bitch of a girlfriend dumped me." "I see," said the man, "You had a fight and broke up." "No!" Hank growled then slammed back the second shot, "She dumped me for an over-muscled gorilla!" "She left because she found some guy with big muscles?" the man asked. "The fucking bitch!" Hank snarled. "Did she say why?" the man asked. "She said that that bastard made her feel safe and protected." Hank complained, "She was always safe with me. Never lost a fight in my life! Besides, I'm better looking than that fucking roided-up freak." "So she just dropped you like that?" the man asked, "She found herself a big muscleman and you're history." "I told her I'd start lifting weights and building up my muscles if would make feel better but she said she couldn't wait." Hank explained bitterly, "She said she still liked me and we could still be friends. Why? Why do all those fucking bitches say that?" "I guess to make you feel better." the man said. They sat there in silence as Hank polished off his beer. The man ordered another round. The bartender set the drinks down in front of them. "If there was only a way to make my muscles big now," Hank sighed, "she'd be my girl again." The man started looking Hank over intently. After a few seconds , the man looked deeply into Hank's bleery eyes. Hank started feeling really uncomfortable. Just as Hank began thinking that this guy was trying to pick him up, the man looked away. The man then reached into his trenchcoat and pulled out what Hank thought was a thin magazine. "I think you can use this." The man said as he handed the 'magazine' to Hank. "I ain't into fag porno." Hank said pushing the man's hand away. "It's not a porno mag." The man explained, "It's a catalog. A very special and exclusive catalog. There are only three of these in the world. It'll help you get what you want and more." "If it's such a big deal, why give it to me? Why not keep it yourself?" Hank asked, "What's the catch?" "It's not any good to me now." the man answered, "The catch is that you can order as nuch as you want but you can only order once." "So, what do I do? Order a new Girlfriend?" Hank sneered. "No. It's not that kind of catalog." the man replied, "This catalog offers things that can change you." "Change? How?" Hank asked. "Change almost anything about yourself. Physically or mentally." the man answered as slipped the catalog into Hank's coat, unnoticed. Hank looked at the man as if the man was insane. When the man saw Hank's expression, he explained. "I used to be fat. I weighed over 350 pounds of fat. Last week, I was given the catalog. I order two things from it. One to give me a trim, athletic runners' body and the other to make my dick bigger. I got the items and 'BOOM,' I was a new me." The man opened up his coat, showing off his trim body and displaying a huge bulge at his crotch. Hank jumped off his barstool away from the guy. Hank was now convinced that the man was a fag trying to pick him up. Hank grabbed his coat from the barstool without noticing the catalog inside. "Remember, you can order as much as you want but you can only order once." the man said as he grabbed Hank's arm. "Let go of me, you fucking queer!" Hank shouted as he pulled away. Hank rushed out of the bar, feeling both angry and disgusted. As he headed back to his apartment, in a spiteful moment, he hoped that the fag would get the shit kicked out of him. By the time he returned to his apartment, Hank is furious with the way the day turned out. First, his girlfriend dumps him for a two-ton freak-of-nature, then while he having a few drinks, a fag hits on him. After slamming the door to his apartment, Hank throws his coat at a chair. He goes into the kitchen and grabs a fifth of whiskey from the cabinet. After turning on the radio, he crashes on the couch. He begins taking swigs from the bottle as he listens to the radio. A hour later, Hank has nearly drank two-thirds of the bottle. He slouches there on the couch in a drunken stupor. Diana Ross' song 'Muscles' comes on the radio. Hearing the song reawakens his anger. Hank stumbles off the couch and grabs his coat. The catalog falls out and catches his attention. He picks up the catalog and looked at the cover. The cover read:

The Male Improvement Catalog providing devices to instantly make you the man you think you should be

Reading the cover made Hank intensely curious. He sat back down on the couch and browsed through the catalog. Normally he would be very skeptical of such things but as drunk as he was and as depressed and angry, his normal skeptism was gone. As he thumbed through the catalog he found it was divided into sections. The first section dealt with body hair. This section offered devices for the gaining or losing of body hair, changing the color of existing body hair, or a combination of both. It also showed a series of pictures of a man going from completely hairless to a hairy bear of a man. "I don't need that." Hank thought aloud, "I've always had enough hair in all the right places." The following section dealt with changing the face. Changing the color, shape, and/or size of the eyes was offered. Changing the shape and/or size of the nose or mouth was offered as well. In fact, changing the entire face was possible. "My face looks good enough already." Hank thought aloud again, "Best not mess with it." The next section dealt with hair. Hank just skimmed through it. The following section dealt with physiques. The first part was for changing height. Growing taller or shorter. The next part was for gaining or losing fat. The last part, the one that interested Hank, was for gaining or losing muscles. This part was further divided into categories: swimmer/runner build, football/powerlifter build, gymnast/wrestler build, and bodybuilder/muscleman build. His girl had dumped him for the bodybuilder type. This category offered devices by weight class. Looking at the pictures for each weight class, Hank knew he had to be as big--no bigger than his rival. But he couldn't decide if the guy was a light-heavy or a heavyweight. Hank found at the bottom of the page another selection without a picture. He read:

Mountains of Muscle will give the biggest and most massive muscles possible

This was what Hank wanted. He wrote down the order number. He began flipping through the catalog to find the ordering instructions. As he flipped through the specialty kits sections, Hank spied the words "Perfect Sex" which immediately grabbed his attention. He looked over the page and saw that it was for a device to make one the perfect sex partner. The device gave one the skill and expertise to perform any sexual act with any partner. The device also came with an optional sex morpher. The sex morpher insured that what part of the body that was involved in the sex act would be of the correct size and shape to provide the most pleasure to all parties involved. There were four order numbers listed. Two for women and two for men, one set without the sex morpher and the other with. He wrote down the order number for the device with the sex morpher for men, forgetting that the catalog was for men. Hank started flipping towards the back of the catalog, glancing through the section on specialty kits, when he spotted a device for pheromones. The device enabled a person to emit a directed stream of pheromones at another person. The pheromones would only affect the targetted person and cause them to be very sexually attracted to them. Hank quickly wrote down the order number. "Yeah," Hank thought aloud, "With this stuff, I get the big muscles she wants then give her the best sex she's ever had and then I hit her with with the horny juice. So, when she's all hot for me, I dump her like she's did me." Satisfied with his plan, Hank flipped through the catalog and finally found the order page. He grabbed the phone and began dialing. After dialing over twenty-five number, he waited for the phone to connect. "Must be in another country." Hank again thought aloud. The line rang several times. Hank heard a number of tones through the phone. Just as he was getting ready to hang up, a computerized voice came onto the line. "Welcome to the Male Improvement Catalog Order Line." the voice said, "Please enter the number of items you wish to order." Hank pressed the three key on his phone. "Please enter the order number of the first item followed by the pound sign." the voice instructed, "Then enter the next order number also followed by the pound sign. After that enter the order number of the last item followed by the star key." Hank entered the order numbers as instructed. "You have ordered: "Mountains of Muscle", "Perfect Sex Partner with Sex Morpher for Men", and "Directed Pheromones". If this is correct press 1, if not press 2." the voice directed. Hank quickly pressed 1. He waited for the next set of instructions. After a few minutes of silence, the computer voice returned. "We are sorry but there will be a short delay in delivery. To compensate you for the delay, we are sending the enhanced versions of the items you have ordered. Thank you for ordering from the Male Improvement Catalog. Good-bye." Hank just stared at the phone. He was confused because they never asked for a credit card number or his address. He hung the phone up. He laid back on the couch and popped open the front of his shirt. He scratched his chest absent-mindedly. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey and proceeded to finish off the bottle. Soon Hank was passed out. A high pitched whine awoke Hank. Through bleary eyes, he saw a small, strange box sitting on top of the catalog. He reached over and picked up the box. After a few seconds of fumbling, he managed to open the box. When he opened the box something hard and heavy fell out and hit his chest. Figuring that whatever it was had bounced onto the floor, he pulled out the folded piece of paper from the box. He unfolded the paper and read:

Attach the Voice Activated Male Improvement (VAMI) module to the subject. Wait at least 5 minutes after attachment for the vocal interface systems to activate. For best results, wait at least 30 minutes to allow for full adaptation. For Permanent Changes: say "I want this" For one hour Test Change: say "Try this" To deattach or terminate Test: say "Forget this" the VAMI module will detach and you revert to your old self. REMEMBER. THE ONLY WAY TO REVERSE PERMANENT CHANGES IS WITH THE RESTORE MODULE, IF YOU HAVE ORDERED ONE. Enjoy the NEW you.

Still fairly drunk and half asleep, Hank couldn't really understand what he had just read. He decided to leave until morning to figure it out. He set the box and the paper down on the table. He then laid back down on the couch. Soon he was out cold once more. Several hours later, he woke up with a raging hangover. He sat up and then grabbed his head in searing pain. "Shit! Fuck!" Hank said as he winced in pain, "What the fuck did I do last night?!" Hank scrubbed his face with his hand. His mouth mouth felt as if it had been stuffed with chalk. While waiting for his head to clear, he began scratching his chest and encountered a hard object attached to it. "What the fuck?" Hank thought aloud. Hank stood up and staggered over to the picture mirror. In the mirror, he saw that a triangular shaped gem was stuck to his chest. He tugged at it but it wouldn't come loose. "Shit." Hank thought aloud, "Must be some weird-assed piercing. I got to get rid of it before everyone thinks I'm some sort of freak." Hank again grabbed hold of the gem and started pulling on it. He felt sharp pain with each tug. It felt like he was trying to rip his skin off. The gem stayed firmly attached. Hank was getting angry. "One more try." Hank thought aloud, "If doesn't come off, then I'll cut it off." Hank grabbed the gem. He began pulling with all of his strength. He gritted his teeth through the pain and continued to pull. "I..." Hank grunted through the pain, "Want....This.....Fuc-----AAAArgh!" Hank screamed as a fiery energy rush through his body. His brain felt as if it was being ran over by a lawn mower. He clutched his head as the pain increased. The pain suddenly stopped. Hank looked up, panting heavily. Hank looked into the mirror again. He saw that the gem was slowly sinking into his chest. He tried to grab the gem once more but arms and legs suddenly locked out stiff as boards. He watched helplessly as the gem sank completely into his chest. He began to feel very warm. Waves of heat raced through his body. Even worse, it felt like someone had put his balls into a hot frying pan. Hank felt his blood pounding in his ears as it rushed through his body. As he looked in the mirror, he saw his skin flush and his veins began to stand out. Frozen in place, Hank watched as his muscles began to swell. At first, it was barely noticeable but soon accelerated. In awe, he watched as his thickened and broadened, slowly pushing open his shirt. His tight abs grew larger and more powerful. He felt his shirt stretch tight across his back and shoulders. His arms felt constricted in his shirt sleeves. His legs pressed so hard against the demin of his pants that individual muscles clearly showed through. Hank's muscles twitched and shirt ripped and shredded into thousand pieces. His chest grew thicker and more muscled like he now had the pecs of the gods. His shoulders became so broad that he could not both sets of delts in the same mirror. His delts themselves made 'cannonballs' and 'boulders' words to describe marbles with their unbelievable size. His traps soared with incredible thickness to the inhuman sized column of neck. His arms were the epitome of huge and powerful, his biceps were mountainuous peaks of veined muscle. His lats flared wide creating a wall of muscle. His abs were etched and craved mounds of muscle. Hank flexed his legs and his jeans became a pile of thread. From his narrow and tight waist, Hank's thighs swelled into incredible massiveness as each muscle of his quads and hams doubled and doubled again in size and strength. His calves grew into tremedously giant diamonds of muscle that were the of the size that his thighs used to be. His thinned and tightened over his body making him looked even larger. Hank looked his newly muscled body over. He flex and rubbed each sensual mass of muscle. He found these muscles definitely to his liking. "With a bod like this, I'll never run short on hard cocks or tight asses to play with." He said to himself. He was very briefly confused by a thought or memory that it wasn't men he wanted. But with a few more flexes all confusion was gone. Still flexing, Hank heard someone knocking fanatically on his door. "Come in." He called out, but kept his attention focus on his massive muscles. "Hank! Ah-uh, Hank?" voice from behind him said. Hank turned around and saw his neighbor Gary. Hank knew that Gary was gay like he was but Hank couldn't remember why they never 'been together'. Hank stood there looking Gary over and saw that Gary was definitely turned on by Hank's new body. As Hank took a step forwarded, he felt his cock and balls suddenly grow even larger. A second look at Gary told Hank that Gary was a big size queen and that Hank was his walking wet dream. Hank stepped out from around the chair to stand in front of Gary. Gary fell to his knees and began to worship the total massiveness that was Hank. Gary fondled, caressed and groped every hard and muscular inch of Hank's body and Hank just seemed to know where and how to touch him to drive him wild. Lost in the wild waves of lust, Gary sat upon Hank's mammoth cockhead. With one swift and powerful stroke, Hank took Gary's virginity. Soon, Gary was panting and begging for rest while Hank felt energized and ready for more. Hank draped Gary across the couch and slipped into the largest pair of shorts he had. Hank remembered the muscle man that was the cause of this huge change. Hank told Gary to be thinking of some way to please when he got back, then Hank hit Gary with the hormones. Hank left to take the muscle man from his former girl andmake him one of his lovers. Meanwhile Gary, squirming under the affects of the hormones, spys the 'Male Improvement' catalog. •

This collection was originally created as a compressed archive for personal offline viewing
and is not intended to be hosted online or presented in any commercial context.

Any webmaster choosing to host or mirror this archive online
does so at their sole discretion.

Archive Version 070326