Exaggeration

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By More2048

“Things are going great so far,” I say to myself as I walk along the trail with my two buddies.

“Well besides last night where you push me off the balcony” said Doug, as he chucked a soggy stick at me. Batting it away from my head.

“Dale you so deserved that and you know it. If I was in Zach’s position there I would have jettisoned you off the balcony!” remarked Brian.

“Yeah next time you feed me 57 chili peppers disused inside a cake. I'm gonna shove it up your.”

“Yeah yeah yeah. What’s done is done, now if you don’t mind I would like to get out of here before it gets dark and critters start to creep about.” Interjected Doug, cutting me off mid sentence. Classic of him.

“Alright well we went south, so were gonna want to head back north, hmm common back up this trail” I said as we ventured back.

Me and my best friends Doug and Brian were out camping in the Catskills for 2 weeks. Fresh out of high school, we wanted to do something on our own for once. With out our lame parents about. So right after graduation we snuck up here with backpacks, camping equipment, and a car full of food and testosterone inflated teenagers, we were set. We wanted excitement, adventure, and well just plain fun. At the moment though, things weren’t going so well, and soon after, it got down right creepy.

“Dude are you sure this is the way came, on the way down the water was flowing towards that side” stated Brian.

“Well this is the only direction the trail goes, and we didn’t deviate off it all so this is the only way possible.” I said confidently as not to cause an argument. Quite frankly though, I was lost. Doug was picking up on this

“Bull. We were not in this trail at all, there was a waterfall we passed about a mile before we turned around, and we have easily gone farther then that and we still haven’t seen one. These rock formations don’t even look familiar” In Doug’s normal fashion, he took over the three of us again. Ripping the map out of my backpack and ran in front of us. “See this is the way we came and… huh, were on the trail… but it’s not on the map, how old is this thing” said Doug inquizivly.

“I don’t know Brian got it”

“I grabbed it at the checking office before we drove up to our cabin, it can’t be that old because there were a bunch of tourist brochures next to it.” Brian said matter-of-factly

“Well were clearly not anywhere on the trail. Here lets go ahead and maybe well find the way.” He ran his thick blocky hands across his sweaty face. The humidity was getting to us all. And with him wherein a skintight shirt under a sweater wasn’t helping him. We walked onward.

“Dude just take the sweater off, your going to overheat” Brian said as he took his off, exposing his hairy and lightly muscled torso. He tossed his sweater on the ground in relief.

“Put your shirt back on you queer” Doug joked at Brian. I reached down and scooped up his sweater.

“Might want to bring this with you bud,” I said as I tossed him his sweater.

“Bah I don’t need it, you take it.” Said Brian clearly overheated as well.

“Meh, might as well join the club” I said as I peeled off my sweat soaked shirt, revealing my long torso. “Blegh gross” I looked down to find my chest covered with short black hairs again.

“shaving all that off is just gonna come and bite you in the ass later on, you know it only grows back thicker and denser” stated Brian

“Yea I know but I have to do it for swimming, and waxing just fucking hurts,” I said.

“hah sucks for you two” Doug pealed off his undershirt, revealing a muscle bound torso, wrestling did wonders for him, and over the last year he had exploded to 190 pounds, quite impressive for someone only 5’5. “smoothes and clean. Ooh yeahh” he said cockily.

“Ooh but what’s this!” yelled Brian “I see some hair right down yonder” he pointed to his bellybutton area.

“wha? Aww shit, common genetics don’t fail me now! I don’t wanna be some sasquach like poor old zachy over here!” he looked down to see a small treasure trail forming, then looking up to mock me.

“What did you say bub?” I walked over closely to him; being 6’2, I dwarfed him quite a bit. Making sure my chest was in contact with his face.

“Alright Alright that’s enough you two, break it up” Brian walked over to separate us. We all burst out laughing.

“That’s it!” Doug runs full force into be and tackles me into the ground. We rolled around for a minute, until he knees me in the crotch and I retract in pain. Was over me on all fours. His square facial features and light blonde stubble were highlighted in the sunlight. Sweat dripped from his chin. “Do you give?!” he said panting with a cocky smile.

“Some... Wrester... u are…” I said in pain. “Kneeing someone in the crotch like that.” I braced my back on the hill, and with one quick shove, I pushed him back on the trail with both my feet. He fell with an audible thud into Brian who was watching confused as usual. I pushed my hair back with my hands and stood up. “Serves you right, sorry bri.”

“Yeah sure you are.” He kicked Doug off him stood up and straighter out his shirt. “Keep off me you hotheaded oaf.” He scolded Doug. Brian always was the mediator of the group. Seldom getting in arguments. He went quite agents the grain of a typical Italian in that sense. He looked exactly like one, just didn’t act it. “Now if you two are done smashing each other like the incredible hulk. Maybe we can get back on trail”

Doug beat his chest like a gorilla and jumped around. “Quit it you ape, lets get going.” I said as we walked along. •


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