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Smokin' New Life
|When the new cigar boys woke up in the morning, shocked is not the word you would use to describe their reactions. They were beyond stunned, each one taking turns looking at his new self in the mirror. John, now a Chinese muscle freak, could barely believe his eyes. "Dude," he whispered, flexing muscles he didn't know existed.
Greg, formerly an obese slob, was now a Hispanic--Puerto Rican, perhaps?--killer. "Dios mio," he said, surprised by the language he was speaking. He had no prior experience with Spanish (he'd taken French in high school), but the words were coming out like he was native speaker, complete with a sultry accent. He was happy to note he could still speak English.
Chip, once a weakling, was now a jacked surfer dude. "Fuckin' rad, bro," he said, California accent sweetening the phrase. Steve looked like he belonged more in the military than a small liberal arts college, examining the way the light reflected off his shiny bald head, offset nicely by the thick, dark goatee he had developed.
DeShaun swaggered into the room where they had slept, laughing lightly. "'Sup y'all? Like what you see?" All four guys were too engrossed by their new bodies--and minds--to notice DeShaun talking to them.
"How did this happen?" one of them said.
"The cigars, bro," DeShaun said, clutching a cigar (it was too early for weed) in his teeth. "The black ones do some crazy shit. I guess y'all learned that." He stood behind them and asked, "So, y'all got anyone you want to help out like we helped you?"
The guys considered the thought, and got really excited at the prospect of helping change the lives of other less-than-perfect guys like they had been. They all nodded, and DeShaun motioned for them to follow him. They had work to do--but not before some shopping.
All four guys got new clothes, which they sorely needed because their old ones didn't come close to fitting anymore. John, who did indeed choose to change his name to Jin, opted for a simple black wife beater with mesh shorts and white sneakers, but got his ears pierced with diamond studs. Chip chose a Billibong outfit and ended up looking like a catolog model any company would die to sign. Steve went with a simple outfit as well, a white shirt and jeans. Greg, who had decided Juan would be his new name, decided to model himself after DeShaun, picking out an urban wardrobe similar to his benefactor's.
After leaving the clothing stores, the guys mets up with the rest of the cigar brothers at a nearby tattoo parlor. Nick greeted each of them at the door. "Come on in, bros. We're gonna get something special." One by one all of the guys, now numbering about three dozen, took their turns getting a black cigar inked onto their massive right shoulders. Some of them weren't satisfied and made appointments to come back for more ink.
Once the ink was taken care of, the group split up again, and DeShaun and Nick returned with the new initiates to their dorm. They got more than a few curious looks on the way. After all, there did seem to be a massive influx of heavily muscled, gorgeous men on campus.
Each of the new guys identified a friend they thought would benefit from the magic smoke and invited them to the house that night. Juan chose his roommate, Kyle, a sickly kid who spent much of his time worrying about his health, even though he was in good shape overall. Jin brought his study partner, Tom, a black guy who didn't buy into the hip hop culture that DeShaun personified. Steve chose Kevin, a short kid with undistinguished features, while Chip escorted his longtime friend Bobby, who actually wrestled in high school in a low weight class.
When they all arrived at the cigar house, Chip, Steve, Jin and Juan brought the black cigars to each of their "pledges". They were hesitant, as everyone was before their change, but eventually settled in and smoked them down. They took their second stogies without question and seemed to enjoy themselves.
All four of the boys crashed in the same room their "big brothers" had the night before, and the guys watched them as they slept. Tom was the first to change. He had been black before, but now his skin's dark color faded somewhat an olive shade darker than Nick's. His hair stayed black, but became smooth and long, growing out to his shoulders. His facial features realigned somewhat, and very soon it was clear he was now of Middle Eastern origin. His body followed suit, inflating with powerful new muscle from neck to calves, doubling in weight from 120 to 240 pounds. Tom now looked like he could compete with the best of the world's bodybuilders.
Kevin was next. His torso and legs lengthened, increasing his height from 5'2" to just under 7'. His facial features didn't change too much, but his jawline strengthened, his crooked nose repaired itself and he grew a narrow, perfectly manicured chinstrap beard. To go along with all that height, Kevin grew muscles that didn't make him look necessarily freaky, but gave him the build of a basketball center that could give Shaq a game in the paint.
Now it was Kyle's turn. Juan's roommate, a hypochondriac to the nth degree, was quickly turning into a solid column of muscle. His light brown hair darkened slightly, and soon appeared a three-day growth of stubble. His upper body muscles blew up drastically, leaving somewhat asymmetrical legs. But it was the curious bump in his lower lip that gave away his new station in life. Kyle was soon a baseball player, complete with a giant lipper of tobacco and arms strong enough to belt 70 homers out of the yard every season.
Finally, Bobby made his transformation. The onetime wrestler would remain a wrestler, but the new Bobby wouldn't be grappling on any high school gymnasium mats. This guy belonged under the hot lights of the pro wrestling circuit. He was quickly bald, with trap muscles so obscenely large his neck seemed to disappear. Pecs and biceps followed suit; there was enough raw strength in his upper body to tear most normal men to shreds. His legs, too, exploded with new muscle, and he'd surely have to adjust his gait when he awoke in the morning.
Their changes complete, Jin, Juan, Steve and Chip stoked the last ends of their cigars in satisfaction, proud to have been able to help out their less fortunate friends.
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