Thoughts as I get close to my 35th Birthday

By Itamuscle66

OK, here is my little contribution to this ongoing topic. It would be great to receive comments, and share ideas from fellow muscleheads!

Yes, like many others, I got myself into the world of bodybuilding, because in my mid twenties I realized that I liked muscled men, VERY muscled men.

Second step: despite of my looks, the guys I fantasized about did not seem to be interested in me - I rarely had the opportunity to see my glances returned.

All this soon lead to some kind of frustration, that gave me the power and the strenght to hit the gym with more energy than I had done in the past. One more last rep performed, even if it feels like it is tearing me apart, is the golden path to what I will eventually become. Going to the gym was soon not enough - I started dieting, take supplements, and got myself into that quasi erotic state of mind of a bodybuilder in the make.

Even today, as my bodyfat keeps decreasing, and my weight increasing, I am not satisfied by the way I look: I want to be bigger, and the sky is the limit.

Every night I look at myself in the mirror and see my abs getting deeper and deeper, and finding new veins emerging from my flesh gives me an immense pleasure.

My clothes are getting tight in the right places, and they usually last a season. After that, I have to buy new and bigger stuff.

Even the rest of my body is changing: I cut my hair shorter, grew a goatee, and started shaving my body. I lay in the sun as much as I can to get the right skin color - my entire life is devoted to becoming a muscle machine, a fucking muscle monster.

After a long time I had not been there, I took a walk throught the streets of Chelsea, wearing just a tight tank top and shorts. The type of guys that used to ignore me, finally DO look back. I felt happy.

But all this is not enough: I WANT TO BE BIGGER.

Next week, I'll be starting my first cycle. I am nervous, I admitt, but I am also looking forward to see what I'll be able to become.

In the meantime, I keep checking my body, expecially after an intense workout…. It shows me already what I will be shorty capable to become.

Hope to hear from you guys.

Itamuscle •

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